Slayed by the Bell

An excess of exit passes

Posted on 07-03-202411-03-2024by admin

Navigating the Passpocalypse

A seemingly benign practice has evolved into an issue that’s impacting education far more than perhaps we realise, and as a teacher, it is definitely grating on me. Here is a typical scenario: a student raises their hand, brandishing a brightly coloured, laminated pass like it’s a VIP ticket to meet Taylor Swift backstage, and proceeds to step out of class. Seems harmless, right? Wrong. It’s become a significant issue: the overabundance of time-out passes is threatening to derail learning and I can’t shake it off. But before I go absolutely postal, it’s crucial to acknowledge that I fully support the use of these passes for genuine reasons and to those kids, I’ve got your backs. However, I can’t help but feel that they’re sometimes distributed to students who may not need them as much as others.

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Good Will Hunting

Posted on 04-03-202411-03-2024by admin

Exposing Schools’ double standards: Economic vs social relationships

A stark dilemma haunts the corridors but it is not the foul stench of SLT polluting the corridor as they come to deliver a fresh set of laminated bullshit that “must be displayed in every classroom”. Instead, it’s a paradox where goodwill, vital for harmonious school-staff relations, is now treated as a commodity. This isn’t an abstract concept; it’s a predicament with real repercussions for teachers, students, and education in general.

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Branding vs. Substance

Posted on 29-02-202411-03-2024by admin

How Branding Eclipses Educational Integrity

The cry of ‘Just do it’ echoes from SLT as they fuel a frustrating trend, but are schools prioritising branding over substance? Schools, especially academies, are eager to establish a unique identity, often relying on shit slogans and bullshit-branded policies, and insisting on brand recognition. But news flash: brand recognition is earned, not imposed. And, beneath the surface lies a significant problem—a gap between branding efforts and the actual educational value they claim to offer.

Communication Expectations Leadership Policies

“Research shows…”

Posted on 26-02-202421-02-2024by admin

ie. I heard it on a podcast once

Within leadership-led seminars for teachers, a familiar refrain echoes: “Research shows…” But behind this authoritative phrase lies a glaring truth – an obsession with educational research often blinds senior leaders to the broader horizons of knowledge. Instead of embracing a wealth of diverse insights, they find solace in the comforting embrace of their own echo chambers, where education-derived research reigns supreme. But this myopic approach comes at a cost – a cost paid by students, educators, and the future of education itself… and honestly, IT’S SOOOOOO DULL!

Behaviour Expectations Leadership Policies Well-Being

The Business Dress Myth

Posted on 22-02-202421-02-2024by admin

How ‘smart dress’ is a red herring

In the classroom, innovation and student engagement should be paramount, but there is an alternate focus for some SLT because, let’s face it, they have fuck all better to do: the enforcement of “business dress” for teachers. While proponents argue that such attire fosters seriousness, it’s time to address the elephant in the room—this is a school, not a fucking bank from the 1920s. The impracticality of suits and ties in an educational setting is glaring, and the repercussions are profound.

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Schools need teachers, not directors

Posted on 19-02-202421-02-2024by admin

The Great Hoax

In the cash-strapped world of education, where every penny and every minute counts, beware the conniving cash bandits that are lurking: the directors of subject. These supposed masters of academia find themselves perched on high salaries, yet their impact on learning is about as noticeable as a fart in a hurricane. This article aims to dissect this enigma and expose why directors of subject provide scant value to schools.

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Pen to Politeness

Posted on 15-02-202418-02-2024by admin

Basics in Decline

Step into a modern-day classroom and you might be forgiven for thinking you’ve wandered onto the set of a Kafkaesque sitcom: students, chauffeured to school like VIPs, lounging in their seats with an air of entitlement. But the laughter fades when you realise the punchline—their desks are barren, devoid of the most basic tools for learning. Pens? Pencils? F**k that! Welcome to the paradox of education in the 21st century, where chauffeur-driven arrivals collide with a distinct absence of independence and initiative. It’s a scene that’s both farcical and foreboding, underscoring a troubling trend in our schools.

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Parents can be dick-trees

Posted on 12-02-202418-02-2024by admin

Navigate the Minefield of Parental Behavior

In the world of education, teachers find themselves not only attempting to mould young minds but also facing growing pressure to participate in discussions about behaviour with parents. Regrettably, a growing number of parents are finding it challenging to demonstrate appropriate standards of behaviour themselves — to the point, they are grade-a dicks and it is often evident that the apple hasn’t fallen too far from the proverbial dick-tree! Let’s explore the complexities and implications of this relationship between educators and parents, without reaching for the axe or box of matches.

Communication Expectations Leadership Policies Time Management Well-Being Workload

Chronic Email

Posted on 09-02-202418-02-2024by admin

Navigating the Sea of bullshit communication

The infamous flood of emails – a digital deluge that rivals a monsoon in rainy season but Noah can’t save you from this cataclysm. Imagine: you’re drowning in a sea of notifications, desperately trying to stay afloat amidst the relentless tide of bullshit email communication. The struggle is real, and the irony is undeniable. Let’s plunge into the depths of this email abyss and explore the multifaceted dilemma that engulfs education.

Leadership Well-Being Workload

Hubris unleashed

Posted on 02-02-202418-02-2024by admin

Narcissistic email Monologues

Picture this: you’re at your desk, drowning in a sea of emails, and just when you thought you could catch a breath, another one arrives. But this isn’t your average email; it’s a lengthy monologue from a member of the leadership, sharing their profound thoughts and opinions on the latest educational buzz. Welcome to the world of verbose, all-staff emails – a phenomenon that’s as perplexing as it is infuriating.